You work out of a Hotel?
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize