Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
