I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
Randomize
