Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
