Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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