Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize