he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
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Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
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Your shirt... Was in my pants
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
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