He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
pray to the hookup gods
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
