it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
