I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Randomize