He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
