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• (224): View more from Illinois

  his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.

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• (479): View more from Arkansas

  Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.

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• (773): View more from Illinois

  Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Found 2 Coors, problem solved.

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry

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• (914): View more from New York

  Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (607): View more from New York

  eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.

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• (414): View more from Wisconsin

  I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  What happened?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  New Orleans

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Every time

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• (408): View more from California

  you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT

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• (646): View more from New York

  WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.

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