Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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