i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I'm getting married
To pizza
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize