the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I think that girl got really offended when I made out with baby Jesus.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
