My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
I know her cup size but not her name....
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