i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
