Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize