I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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