Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Randomize
