Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
