I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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