i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
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