standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
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