Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
