So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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