let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
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Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
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the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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