i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize
