I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
