Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I think I died a long time ago.
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.