wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
33 Sex Crazed People That Are Going Balls Deep
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
21 Family Members Confess The Creepiest Things They Know About a Relative
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist