my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
