I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
