): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
