she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
