so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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