Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Randomize