i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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