Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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