he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize