Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize