Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  oh good, I think they're gone

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  the painters?

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  my herpes

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  (860): oh good, I think they're gone (215): the painters? (860): my herpes http://tfl.nu/ob9r
  Replies (7) Good night (796) Bad night (1450)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes

  (847): View more from Illinois

  And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.

  (319): View more from Iowa

  At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.

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  (319): True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes (847): And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me. (319): At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements. http://tfl.nu/k3x0
  Replies (32) Good night (4500) Bad night (665)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.

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  (805): i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog. http://tfl.nu/tph4
  Replies (3) Good night (2264) Bad night (584)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.

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  (215): Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions. http://tfl.nu/2ubl
  Replies (9) Good night (709) Bad night (2646)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?

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  (916): So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off? http://tfl.nu/zq3l
  Replies (114) Good night (24571) Bad night (942)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be

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  (503): like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be http://tfl.nu/q4d6
  Replies (166) Good night (2114) Bad night (4007)
• Favorite

  (831): View more from California

  Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?

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  (831): Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21? http://tfl.nu/gpnq
  Replies (37) Good night (6773) Bad night (1277)
• Favorite

  (208): View more from Idaho

  can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?

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  (208): can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened? http://tfl.nu/sf3c
  Replies (23) Good night (4622) Bad night (1295)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks

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  (918): they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks http://tfl.nu/5j5t
  Replies (27) Good night (1245) Bad night (7125)
• Favorite

  (718): View more from New York

  Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.

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  (718): Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober. http://tfl.nu/eick
  Replies (13) Good night (6525) Bad night (1572)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?

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  (734): THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!? http://tfl.nu/2mg7
  Replies (19) Good night (4507) Bad night (1166)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.

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  (479): As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man. http://tfl.nu/2x85
  Replies (2) Good night (869) Bad night (431)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great

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  (610): On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great http://tfl.nu/63wg
  Replies (6) Good night (1005) Bad night (505)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us

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  (508): I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us http://tfl.nu/g48g
  Replies (6) Good night (1040) Bad night (309)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed

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  (484): Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed http://tfl.nu/tho4
  Replies (7) Good night (811) Bad night (320)

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