so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
