Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
