i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
