Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
