Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
That reminds me...we need to get swords
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
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