direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
