I need help removing her.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
