so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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