i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Randomize
